Weight thoughts

gonzostar is from the future. She had gastric bypass surgery a couple months before I did, so her LJ is a preview of everything I'm about to go through. Having a set-up like this is such a good resource and relief, even though it happened completely by chance.

She's gone through the skin removal surgery, and I have my two year post-surgery appointment with my surgeon next week for the referral to the plastic surgeon for the same thing. If I want to do it.

That's a big, big part of it: If I want to do it.

Is it strange that I'm leaning strongly towards not doing it?

I have a hell of a lot of "extra skin" (what a gross term, huh?). But I've had a big stomach my entire life -- from the time I was single digits years old. So I'm used to it. When I was at my highest weight, my body didn't bother me, and it still doesn't bother me now.

There's also the issue of infections. I've had MRSA (antibiotic-resistant infections) multiple times, and I have had the "worst" strain of that, the one that's resistant to the most antibiotics. And I'm allergic to most of the antibiotics that are effective on that strain. There's only one antibiotic left that works against it and I'm not allergic to... and it's that one that costs $800 per pill.

If you've ever had MRSA, no matter how long ago, it stays in your body and you're more likely to get it again in the future. The idea of elective surgery seems too great a risk to me... (but I'd ask the surgeon about it and let him decide).

Yesterday I realized there was another reason I was leaning towards not getting it done, though it seems a really odd one... I don't really want to change more. I've never been attracted to skinny people, and I feel like I'm "skinny" enough (even though no one in the world would look at me and think 'skinny').

The only reason I have for wanting the surgery is that the doctor says I have about 15 pounds of skin to remove from my stomach (again, gross I know, sorry). How wonderful it would be to be 15 pounds lighter on the scale! That would be close (or closer...) to my goal weight! But man, that's a bad reason to get a big surgery...