thistlechaser: (Avatar: Zuko)
[personal profile] thistlechaser
I wish someone had said this to me back when I was 13:



Back when I was in school, there had been no school shootings yet. Bullying was okay. Even teachers got in on it (either actively or by looking the other way). Only once did a teacher ever try to stop me from being bullied, and when she was ignored, she gave up.

There was no Internet. Talk about being cut off, being trapped with all these people who hated you and made sure you didn't go a minute without knowing it.

Sometimes I wonder what I would have been like now if I hadn't been bullied every single school day. I couldn't walk from one classroom to another without being pushed, teased, jabbed with thumbtacks and pencils, and other such abuses (the words were by far worse than any physical thing). It started in kindergarten (kindergarten! Because of the kind of lunch I had brought -- jelly and cream cheese on graham crackers, the other kids said it looked like worms) and it never stopped from there. Sometime in college it started slowing down. I think my junior year of college was the first year I had with no teasing.

It makes me bitter now, for so many reasons. No one should have to go through that. To think that positive things, like me liking to read and enjoying learning, only made it worse.

I often think I should be able to just 'shake it off' and forget about it. I was a kid, they were kids, I'm an adult now. It's not that easy though.

Edit: I had intended this to be a positive post, sharing that nice video. The subject of bullying seems to always send me in darker directions though.

Date: 2014-04-01 01:26 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thistle-chaser.livejournal.com
Arg! I got lucky, my father died a few years ago (he had many, many problems and our family suffered for it).

I'm glad you have a better life now! I typoed 'life' as 'wife', but that fits, too. :)

Date: 2014-04-02 01:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] voidmagus.livejournal.com
Thanks! Having friends I only talk to online is something I never would have done when I was younger - people I can't see, can't manipulate, and can not bend to some advantage? Wouldnt bother. That I can have such friends now, and see such discussions as worthwhile, is a major thing. So, thanks :)

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