2014 book: Hatch

[thistlechaser]

Hatch by James Stevens
Rating: 1/hated (1-5/hated-loved)



I no longer hate that self-published books exist. There are some good ones out there. Some great ones, even. Hatch was NOT one of them.

Hatch is the reason people hated self-published books to begin with.

Let's start with the writing first. Actually, let me let the author himself describe the issue:

I just wanted to address the issue of spelling and grammar issues in the book.
It is commonly recommended that when writing a book, you concentrate on the story and its details and ignore typos. That way the flow of inspiration isn't interrupted.
It's important to remember that this story was never written with the intention of being published! I wrote it specifically for my daughters when they were young, and now that they are older did I decide to share it with the world.

So he wrote the book without stopping to fix a single typo. Didn't spellcheck it. Did no editing at all. He sent it off to a "professional editing service", a company that didn't correct a single typo, and without checking their work himself, he sent it off to be published. But it's okay, because he never intended it to be published?

Oh, and the so-called "professional editing service" went out of business right after checking his book.

But hey, if the book "continues to sell well", he'll go back and edit it. How nice of him!

The story itself is as bad as the writing. I'm only about 5% in, and I could give so many examples of stupid, unreasonable stuff.

1) A blacksmith is selling a sword. It's of a metal he never saw before. It's "impossible to melt down". So he's selling it for pennies because it's trash. Buh? Would a smith not be MORE interested in some new metal? Something so strong it can't be melted down? Instead he basically gave it away to the main character.

2) The main character is dumber than a sack of dirt. A dragon (intelligent creatures, though they don't speak the same language as humans), tugs on his pantsleg, walks off a few steps and looks back at him expectantly, then comes back and tugs, walks off in the same direction and looks back at him... and the character has no idea what the dragon is doing.

3) In addition to being stupid, the main character keeps getting special stuff. That sword the blacksmith sold. A golden dragon (most are black or grey, and only a few rare knights get a dragon at all, but streetrat him ran off with one).

4) The main character is just so mind-bogglingly stupid. So he runs off with the dragon clinging to him (it has claws that can slice through armor effortlessly), he dodges guards and blah blah blah, just barely gets out of the city, is being chased by knights... and he forgot he had the dragon. It was clinging to him. It was the reason he was running at all. It's against every law in the land that he has it. And in the space of minutes, he forgot he had it.

Every single character is nothing but a caricature. The evil nephew is killing his uncle the king. The nephew nearly cackles while talking about killing children. The more minor mad guy is, of course, fat. There's a Wise Old Knight who is going to be pushed out by the evil nephew. (As stupid as the main character is, it's the evil nephew that I hate the most. He's just so unrealistically evil.)

And know what pisses me off the most? This book has 199 reviews, an average of 4.5 stars, and 135 five star reviews. What BS.

The only reason I'm still reading this darned thing is that I have a new book to review coming in soon (Winterkill -- looks interesting!), so I don't want to start another book instead. I hope it arrives today, because I can't take more of Hatch.

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Comments

[voidmagus.livejournal.com]

"I decide to share it with the world."

And this is the point at which you at least re-read it and correct shit yourself, right? Christ if editing is that hard, I should go do that for money.

[thistle-chaser.livejournal.com]

So much about that annoys me. The ego on someone to think that something they just made up for their kids is worth publishing? (Sure, for a very few people that might work out, but he is not one of them.) Yet they can't even be bothered to edit it?

Lazy, undeserving author. With 135 five star reviews. Ugh.

[ashmedai.livejournal.com]

Haha - this would make me want to poke my eyes out with a spork. And no editing? Is he for real? I edit everything to bits before my beta reader even sees it. Not doing so is just plain lazy.

[thistle-chaser.livejournal.com]

But all the best writers say not to do it~ And besides, his crap writing is worth so much, we should be happy for it even without the editing!

And I'm with you. I'm far from perfect, but I edit even my LJ posts over and over again!

[ashmedai.livejournal.com]

But all the best writers say not to do it

What, not to edit?

[thistle-chaser.livejournal.com]

Yep. To just write, write, writer, don't stop to edit or fix anything. So he claims, anyway. He said "It is commonly recommended that when writing a book, you concentrate on the story and its details and ignore typos. That way the flow of inspiration isn't interrupted."

I think he missed the implication that if you don't edit while writing, you sure as heck better do it after.

[ashmedai.livejournal.com]

Exactly. That's why the first draft is called a "rough draft", which needs editing after it's completed. Not only once, but multiple times, IMO, before it's fit for public consumption.

[thistle-chaser.livejournal.com]

Yeeep. Exactly that.

[postingwhore.livejournal.com]

135 five star reviews? I'd suggest that he bought them...but that's a lot to buy......

[thistle-chaser.livejournal.com]

Some bought, some traded for from other self-published authors... It's insane, the worst self-published books have the most five star reviews.

[spike7451.livejournal.com]

This is one I will definitely avoid!!

Have joined lj_feedback

[thistle-chaser.livejournal.com]

Wise move, on both things! :)