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thistlechaserI know I've been slacking off and I haven't gotten one of these reviews up lately, but I have a good excuse! That excuse is "Jiabao Brand Preserved Mandarin Peel".
I knew when I bought it that I was probably crazy. Preserved orange peel? Who wants to eat the part of the orange that you throw away? But daring (ha ha) me, I bought it and threw it into the bag of things to try. Slowly that bag emptied, things around the peels getting chosen, but never the peels.
And now it's time.
I took the photos first, so I could start them downloading while I'm writing this up. Took pictures of the outside of it (Front, back), then opened it up so I could take pictures of the peels themselves.
Oh. My. God.
The smell was so strong and so bad, I actually dropped the bag and backed away from my desk. Honestly and without exaggeration, I think (hope) these god awful excuses for candy went bad. No food could smell this way, not raw fish or boiled cat or week-old eggs left out in the sun. This smells like ... like a dead body stuffed into a tree trunk, the tree rotting around the putrid flesh. My camera can't take good close up pictures, but the "peels" even look like rotten flesh, and are covered in white mold-like stuff. (Peels, attempted close up (little fuzzy).)
I know I said it before, but I don't think I can taste this one. I leaned closer to it to look for a little tiny piece for me to maybe try, but the smell drove me back. (And if the smell's not bad enough, the look of it makes me want to vomit.) It smells like rotting flesh and rotting wood mixed together; how can any culture, no matter how different, be willing to eat this?
(Yay! Photos are done. Now to edit them before needing to think about trying the peels.)
(Photos finished and added into the post...)
New readers should understand that I'm not a person who likes new food experiences; when I go out to eat, I'll happily order the same dish week after week after week. So times like these, when I'm faced with needing to try moldy orange peels which smell like rotten meat, are especially hard. ...but I guess I have to, huh? To make this report complete? Hey, maybe they'll even taste good! (Snicker-whimper. Suuuure.) So here we go!
*Gak* *Gag* *Cry!*
Searching through the pile, I tried to find one with the least "mold" on it. Taking it gingerly into hand, I touched it to the tip of my tongue. Somehow these ungodly creations spread the flavor across my whole tongue and into my throat, though I did no more than make a quick touch of it to my tongue. *Burning* salt with a sick-sweet flavor to it, and yes, rotten orange flavor.
Note to self: Next time you try this, keep napkins close at hand. The only one I had was the one the peels are on, and I sure as heck didn't want to scatter those things across my desk. So here I was, jumping around my living room, wiping my tongue on my arm, my shirt, the back of my chair (yuck), and while I grabbed for my cat, she was on edge from me jumping around and so she escaped. By the time I reached the kitchen and ran my tongue under water, it was too late. The flavor was all around my mouth, and I couldn't get it out. Ten minutes later, and from that one little initial touch to my tongue, I can still taste it.
So the rating for this abomination? Mathematicians are still searching for a number low enough. Now I have to go wash my tongue again. Maybe doing it with soap will help...
(Past Japanese Candy Reviews can be found here.)
I knew when I bought it that I was probably crazy. Preserved orange peel? Who wants to eat the part of the orange that you throw away? But daring (ha ha) me, I bought it and threw it into the bag of things to try. Slowly that bag emptied, things around the peels getting chosen, but never the peels.
And now it's time.
I took the photos first, so I could start them downloading while I'm writing this up. Took pictures of the outside of it (Front, back), then opened it up so I could take pictures of the peels themselves.
Oh. My. God.
The smell was so strong and so bad, I actually dropped the bag and backed away from my desk. Honestly and without exaggeration, I think (hope) these god awful excuses for candy went bad. No food could smell this way, not raw fish or boiled cat or week-old eggs left out in the sun. This smells like ... like a dead body stuffed into a tree trunk, the tree rotting around the putrid flesh. My camera can't take good close up pictures, but the "peels" even look like rotten flesh, and are covered in white mold-like stuff. (Peels, attempted close up (little fuzzy).)
I know I said it before, but I don't think I can taste this one. I leaned closer to it to look for a little tiny piece for me to maybe try, but the smell drove me back. (And if the smell's not bad enough, the look of it makes me want to vomit.) It smells like rotting flesh and rotting wood mixed together; how can any culture, no matter how different, be willing to eat this?
(Yay! Photos are done. Now to edit them before needing to think about trying the peels.)
(Photos finished and added into the post...)
New readers should understand that I'm not a person who likes new food experiences; when I go out to eat, I'll happily order the same dish week after week after week. So times like these, when I'm faced with needing to try moldy orange peels which smell like rotten meat, are especially hard. ...but I guess I have to, huh? To make this report complete? Hey, maybe they'll even taste good! (Snicker-whimper. Suuuure.) So here we go!
*Gak* *Gag* *Cry!*
Searching through the pile, I tried to find one with the least "mold" on it. Taking it gingerly into hand, I touched it to the tip of my tongue. Somehow these ungodly creations spread the flavor across my whole tongue and into my throat, though I did no more than make a quick touch of it to my tongue. *Burning* salt with a sick-sweet flavor to it, and yes, rotten orange flavor.
Note to self: Next time you try this, keep napkins close at hand. The only one I had was the one the peels are on, and I sure as heck didn't want to scatter those things across my desk. So here I was, jumping around my living room, wiping my tongue on my arm, my shirt, the back of my chair (yuck), and while I grabbed for my cat, she was on edge from me jumping around and so she escaped. By the time I reached the kitchen and ran my tongue under water, it was too late. The flavor was all around my mouth, and I couldn't get it out. Ten minutes later, and from that one little initial touch to my tongue, I can still taste it.
So the rating for this abomination? Mathematicians are still searching for a number low enough. Now I have to go wash my tongue again. Maybe doing it with soap will help...
(Past Japanese Candy Reviews can be found here.)
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Date: 2003-07-16 10:01 pm (UTC)And speaking of wretched taste, do you suppose you might give those legendary Japanese ice creams a try next, or are they not locally available? (I read about the imagination-defying flavors on some website or other, but I don't remember if they mentioned them being available in the US.)
Next time I go, I can check their frozen section. I've mostly stuck to the candy aisles so far!