You thought Flitwick/Mrs. Norris was bad? (And cooking/food.)

[thistlechaser]

How about Crookshanks/The Whomping Willow? (I quite like the idea of what to do when the tree needs a trim, as well as the interaction between the cat and tree (but not the translations). Other than that, I'm mostly linking to it for the uniqueness of the idea.)

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So at long last, I made elo_sf's Rachael Ray's calzones.

Recipe here.

It's sort of funny that I actually thought these might come out well, since it was *me* who would be cooking them. Other than leaving out the sausage, I followed the directions to the letter. (Though I did cut them in half, since I'm only one person eating.)

The first trouble came with the dough. It stuck to itself and to everything else, so I couldn't get it neat and looking nice. Who cares about that though, since I was intending just to eat it, not photograph it.

I chopped the garlic by hand, making it as fine and small as I could. This turned out not nearly not even close to small/fine enough. Biting into raw garlic is GROSS, even if it's a small piece of it. One whole clove of chopped garlic, blech.

So once I was done putting it all together, they weren't calzone-shaped at all. (But again, that's not too big of a deal, since they'd be even less calzone-shaped once I ate them.) Into the oven, out of the oven. While the "garlic knots" (made with the extra dough) were nothing like real garlic knots, they were semi-okay. The calzones were just icky. While I like ricotta cheese, plain dough stuffed with ricotta is a little (lot) too much. I put in as much of everything else as I was supposed to, but I tasted nothing but ricotta cheese and raw garlic. BLECH.

elo_sf, did you chop your garlic by hand? Is it just me having raw garlic issues, maybe?

Anyway, since I have another package of dough and a ton of cheese, I have another chance at this. Maybe I'll just make pizza rolls (or normal pizza) with it instead... It's really too bad this didn't work out, I was all set for yummy NY style calzones.

Oh the plus side, I'm now totally safe from vampires.

Comments

[webbapettigrew.livejournal.com]

Did you flour your dough before you tried to manipulate it? Spread some flour on your hands and on the dough before you roll it.

As to the garlic, I have the same chopping issues. Best just to buy pre-chopped garlic in a jar.

~webbapettigrew

[thistle-chaser.livejournal.com]

Well, it was dough from a tube (one of those pizza doughs in a tube, just like biscuits in a tube), so I didn't figure I should flour it. That might have been better though.

Yeah, I had the same thought about getting it from a jar, I just wasn't sure if that'd be smaller than I could chop it. On the plus side, it'd probably stay good longer.

sausage + garlic

[elo-sf.livejournal.com]

(1) Ours ended up more stromboli shaped. The dough can be tough to manage, I didn't use flour though, just right onto the pan.

(2) I happened that day to use the pre-minced garlic, so that may have softened any issues. But you could always lightly toast the garlic.

(3) I suspect the sausage or something like it is pretty key to giving the thing taste... not sure. Ours came out great and about 10 people tried them and loved them.

[resonant8.livejournal.com]

You need a microplane grater (http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg/detail/-/B00004S7V8/qid=1061683280/sr=1-1/ref=sr_1_1_etk-kitchen/104-8394344-1573511?v=glance&s=kitchen&n=284507) for garlic. You can grate a clove of garlic into a pulp in about thirty seconds, and you'll never bite down on a piece of garlic again. (It's also the quickest way to grate hard cheeses, and it makes pretty decent lemon zest, too.)

Re: sausage + garlic

[thistle-chaser.livejournal.com]

2) I thought about toasting it, yeah. I wasn't sure if that'd have the right results though, so I didn't try it. Next time I shop, I'm getting a jar of it for sure.

3) I suspected that as well (at least after I was done cooking). Sausage is packed with taste and flavor...

Oh well! It was fun anyway.

[thistle-chaser.livejournal.com]

Woo, thanks for the link! I need a whole ton of kitchen stuff. (I'm pretty new to this whole cooking thing...)

[quasilemur.livejournal.com]

Proper mincing is something that comes with practice. A micrograter is an idea if you lack the skill and don't intend on picking it up. Personally, finely chopping garlic is more or less second nature nature to me...Digging out another tool is just more work when I can just go at it with my knife. There's also a trick to chopping any alliacious bulb (garlic, onion, shallot), that's really simple once you know how.

As for the sausage...major modifications like that are particularly inadvisable when you're not very practiced in cooking. In most recipes, sausage is there for a reason. Aside from the meat, with its meatiness, texture, and ever-essential fats, it's packed with various aromatics and lots of salt. You remove those things without proper compensation, and you're probably going to be in a bad way.

[thistle-chaser.livejournal.com]

A micrograter is an idea if you lack the skill and don't intend on picking it up.

I doubt I will, since I wouldn't use it often. I'm just going to get a char of that pre-minced stuff. Among other reasons, it'll stay better that way. (I usually use only one clove, then the rest goes bad before I need more.)

sausage stuff

Alas and alack! Maybe I'll just make baked ziti with the rest of the cheese, that always comes out yummy.

Thanks for the info!

[spenceraloysius.livejournal.com]

It is easier to chop garlic small if you smash it first with your cleaver. I do it the Jackie Chan way. I take the flat of my cleaver and slam it down on the clove of garlic, making it pancake flat. Then, I dice it length-wise, then perpendicular to the first direction.

[thistle-chaser.livejournal.com]

Huh, that's a good idea. I thought about smushing it, but I figured I should do it *after* chopping...

[quasilemur.livejournal.com]

Nope. Flattening it out with a good firm tap does three things. First, it pretty much pops it out the skin, taking any work out of peeling it. Second, it makes it easier to chop. Third, it bruises it a bit to release some of the oils and Flavor(tm).

[tersa.livejournal.com]

I haven't made elo's recipe, but a few suggestions based solely on your description:

* I second (or third, or fourth) the recommendation to use pre-chopped garlic. You can buy it in little jars and use as needed.

* I also think flouring will help you with the dough.

* I wouldn't use plain ricotta in anything. I would suggest for next time cutting it with either an equal part mozzarella and *shredded* (not grated) parmesan cheese (maybe 3/4 c. shredded mozzarella and 1/4 c. shredded parm to 1 c. ricotta), cut with some cottage cheese, or go out and buy some meatless hamburger patties (I recommend Morning Star brand, from ebonlock's vegetarian recommendation, thaw, chop up, and substitute for the sausage.

[thistle-chaser.livejournal.com]

Huh. Thanks for the tips! They sound like good ideas.