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thistlechaserI left lunch today hating all men. Every single one of them.*
1) I left work and had to merge onto an expressway. Traffic was passing in front of me, so I had to wait. A BMW came up behind me and even before he stopped, started beeping at me. Not once, not twice, not three times, non-stop. What the hell? Did he want me to pull into the traffic? Then what, would he ram me out of the way? Use his Super Duper German Uber-Motorcar to drive over the top of the accident caused by me pulling into oncoming traffic?
2) I get off the expressway and get to the supermarket. Pulled in the driveway. Someone coming down one of the parking aisles cuts me off. What the heck? Usually I'd ignore that, but the BMW idiot man had me annoyed, so I tooted my horn at him. Once. Not a long honk, just a "hey, idiot, I saw that" sort of thing. What does he do? Stop his truck (blocking traffic all around him). Put his head out the window. Starts screaming curses at me. My god! It was at this point I decided that all men needed to be castrated for the good of humanity. Too much testosterone. Eventually he starts moving ... at about two miles an hour. Then he stops again, this time to scream at an old person who did nothing to him!
3) I'm in the store, worrying that insane screaming man will circle back and do something to my car, so I'm rushing my shopping. I need to go down the card aisle, which unfortunately also contains the magazines. Oddly there were many other people also trying to go down this aisle, but all were blocked by one idiot. Some man was standing in the MIDDLE of the aisle, reading a magazine. Not at one side of it, in the middle of the damned aisle. First off, you want to read a magazine? Buy it and take it home! Cheap bastard. Second, why the hell are you ignoring all the people you are forcing to stop and wait and then single file work their shopping cart around your selfish ass? Do not try to claim that you didn't know they were there! At this point of my lunch hour, I was wishing for a gun.
4) Checking out. This fellow was the worst. He's been working there a while, and never once have I missed the unspoken message: He did not want to be there. Fine, great, I don't blame you. You should have stayed in school, idiot, then you wouldn't be spending your life working in a grocery store. He "does his job" (ha ha ha) by throwing my stuff around (literally, from his side of the counter he tossed a pack of soda down into my cart. I had been packing my own stuff, so he couldn't have even knew if he was throwing it onto something!). But here's the good part: I used my ATM card to pay, so I hit the button for $50 back. When he hands over the receipt, the money is hidden in it. Not just folded in half, it's folded four times -- nicely wallet sized! Easy to tuck away without looking what exactly he gave me! Luckily I checked, because there was only $20 in there. When I pointed it out to him, he gave me a flat "oh". No apology at all, and by his tone he was annoyed that I discovered it.
Sixty minutes, four idiot men, no waiting!
On my way home I saw this pretty young Asian girl riding a bicycle. While she was unwisely talking on her cellphone at the same time, I'll forgive her that so long as she doesn't cut her long hair!
*Yes, I'm aware that you cannot judge half the human race on the acts of four men. Besides, I feel better now, so all you men can live. ;-)
1) I left work and had to merge onto an expressway. Traffic was passing in front of me, so I had to wait. A BMW came up behind me and even before he stopped, started beeping at me. Not once, not twice, not three times, non-stop. What the hell? Did he want me to pull into the traffic? Then what, would he ram me out of the way? Use his Super Duper German Uber-Motorcar to drive over the top of the accident caused by me pulling into oncoming traffic?
2) I get off the expressway and get to the supermarket. Pulled in the driveway. Someone coming down one of the parking aisles cuts me off. What the heck? Usually I'd ignore that, but the BMW idiot man had me annoyed, so I tooted my horn at him. Once. Not a long honk, just a "hey, idiot, I saw that" sort of thing. What does he do? Stop his truck (blocking traffic all around him). Put his head out the window. Starts screaming curses at me. My god! It was at this point I decided that all men needed to be castrated for the good of humanity. Too much testosterone. Eventually he starts moving ... at about two miles an hour. Then he stops again, this time to scream at an old person who did nothing to him!
3) I'm in the store, worrying that insane screaming man will circle back and do something to my car, so I'm rushing my shopping. I need to go down the card aisle, which unfortunately also contains the magazines. Oddly there were many other people also trying to go down this aisle, but all were blocked by one idiot. Some man was standing in the MIDDLE of the aisle, reading a magazine. Not at one side of it, in the middle of the damned aisle. First off, you want to read a magazine? Buy it and take it home! Cheap bastard. Second, why the hell are you ignoring all the people you are forcing to stop and wait and then single file work their shopping cart around your selfish ass? Do not try to claim that you didn't know they were there! At this point of my lunch hour, I was wishing for a gun.
4) Checking out. This fellow was the worst. He's been working there a while, and never once have I missed the unspoken message: He did not want to be there. Fine, great, I don't blame you. You should have stayed in school, idiot, then you wouldn't be spending your life working in a grocery store. He "does his job" (ha ha ha) by throwing my stuff around (literally, from his side of the counter he tossed a pack of soda down into my cart. I had been packing my own stuff, so he couldn't have even knew if he was throwing it onto something!). But here's the good part: I used my ATM card to pay, so I hit the button for $50 back. When he hands over the receipt, the money is hidden in it. Not just folded in half, it's folded four times -- nicely wallet sized! Easy to tuck away without looking what exactly he gave me! Luckily I checked, because there was only $20 in there. When I pointed it out to him, he gave me a flat "oh". No apology at all, and by his tone he was annoyed that I discovered it.
Sixty minutes, four idiot men, no waiting!
On my way home I saw this pretty young Asian girl riding a bicycle. While she was unwisely talking on her cellphone at the same time, I'll forgive her that so long as she doesn't cut her long hair!
*Yes, I'm aware that you cannot judge half the human race on the acts of four men. Besides, I feel better now, so all you men can live. ;-)
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no subject
Date: 2004-06-10 01:57 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-06-10 02:04 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-06-10 03:00 pm (UTC)You are sooo heartless. These men's hearts have been broken and you sit there complaining about them?
-Oowth
no subject
Date: 2004-06-10 03:10 pm (UTC)You know, when I look at it that way, it was a much better lunchtime! Thanks!
:)
no subject
Date: 2004-06-10 11:26 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-06-10 04:05 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-06-10 04:19 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-06-10 10:46 pm (UTC)