"..."

Aug. 11th, 2005 02:31 pm
thistlechaser: (Men hugging)
[personal profile] thistlechaser
It's not often that a website leaves me at a total loss for words, but focusonyourchild.com has accomplished that. I'm just boggling at the amount of incorrect, illogical information presented as fact. (Credit for the link goes to [livejournal.com profile] juliansinger, I think? I saw it on my flist this morning, but can't find the post now.)

How would you like to have parents who made comments like this?

"My son couldn’t care less about sports and the great outdoors. He's painfully shy and easily gets hurt. Other kids call him a sissy. I’ve tried everything. My boy even wimped out of Cub Scouts. What am I supposed to do?"

"Our oldest daughter, Lisa, is starting junior high soon. She's a hopeless tomboy. If she had her way, she'd never wear skirts or dresses. She can't wait to sign up for the school wrestling team this fall. If I say no, she'll throw a fit. Where's the magic wand so I can turn her into a lovely princess?"

Oh nos! Your son "wimped out" of Cub Scouts! Oh no! Your daughter won't wear a dress! Gasp! They must be headed down the path towards homosexuality!

But hey, don't worry! If your child does turn out to be gay, they can be cured! Because homosexuality is a disease, after all...

As speechless and annoyed as this site leaves me, it also makes me so sad. Some people believe that stuff. They'll read the site and nod in agreement with it. Their poor, poor kids, and our poor, poor country.

---

On a related note, [livejournal.com profile] kirbyk made a good post this morning on the word 'homophobia':

"I don't like the word homophobia.

Because that's not what it is. I'm sure there are people with an actual irrational fear, a phobia, of gay people. This is a mental disorder, and I feel for them, like people afraid of spiders or the English or what have you. Get well soon.

What most people refer to is more like racism, but with sexual preference instead of skin color."

Find the whole post here.

Date: 2005-08-12 07:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wanderingscribe.livejournal.com
Eeehh...I agree with you for the most part, but I can't help see that first comment in a different light. It sounds to me that the parent is less worried about their son being homosexual and more about him being bullied because he seems to have no hobbies and no interest in conformed gender roles. Kids can be cruel when someone clearly doesn't belong in their 'viewpoint' of how people should be and parents, while meaning well, can be more damaging to a kid because of their own limited preconceptions as to how society works.

However, because the comment is on a site like that, I can also see why someone might believe that it's contempt inspired. ;)

Date: 2005-08-12 03:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thistle-chaser.livejournal.com
I can see your point, but wouldn't it be better if the situation was changed instead of the kids? Instead of trying to make the child fit in, maybe they ("they" being society) should work to stop bullying instead... Then everyone could be themselves without worrying that the crap was going to be kicked out of them if they're different.

Date: 2005-08-13 04:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] wanderingscribe.livejournal.com
Yes, but to stop bullying, you have to stop the mindset that creates it. It's funny you should say something like that, though. Lots of people have tried to change situations in that manner, but haven't had much luck since most bullies take the bullying somewhere else. The only way to prevent that is to 'bully-proof' every place and no one seems to have the resources to do that yet.

Date: 2005-08-14 03:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thistle-chaser.livejournal.com
The only way to prevent that is to 'bully-proof' every place and no one seems to have the resources to do that yet.

Yeah... I'd like to think the parents could stop it, but to do that they'd have to 1) care enough to find out if their kids were bullies (or bullied) and 2) care enough to do something about it. Both of those things are not very likely.

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