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thistlechaserFFXI hasn't been fun for me for a long, long time. In fact, I can't remember the last time I had fun on the game. What few things I do on game feel like nothing but work. That's a bad trait in a game you're paying $15/month for.
About three years ago, I gave WoW a try. I had burned out on FFXI, had nearly quit, so I decided to check it out. It's like a MMO vacation spot! Bright, colorful, amazingly easy! (And highly amusingly, they've made it even easier in the years I've been gone. Lowered fees for things! Give even more XP away! Lowered level requirements!) So hey, maybe since I'm not having fun on FFXI, WoW would now work for me?
Installed it, patched, logged on almost two hours ago. The answer to the above question: A big meh. See, I don't want to play WoW, I want FFXI to be fun again. :/ Everything in WoW is wacky and different. I couldn't even move at first, heh. And the idea of actually touching the mouse on purpose! And the (lack of? different?) camera control keeps making me motion sick. Last time I played I only stayed a month, I doubt this visit will be any longer. (Oh, but a cool thing? My character from three years ago was still there, right where I left him, with all his stuff and all that.)
But what I'd really like to do, even more than WoW or having FFXI be fun again, is RP. "So log onto FF MUX and RP!" I can, and I have, but... but it's so meaningless (my part in it, not the game as a whole). Right now my character could ICly vanish forever and no one would notice. In months, years, maybe one or two people might, but I have no connections to anything in the game. Any RP I get is just random RP with random people with both of us grasping for a subject so we can keep the scene going a little longer. I want connections, I'd say "relationships", but that might imply stuff I don't mean. I want someone to ICly know I exist. I want to be part of something. Le sigh!
And now: Avatar. I decided to dive in and start re-watching it. That's really helpful with learning/remembering who the characters are. "Ooooh, that's who that is!" "Oh, this is where he came from, right!" But more than re-watching the series, I'm really happy that I found fanfic. It keeps the series alive even though it's over. And it's funny how it changes your view of characters... While watching the series, I disliked Sokka. To put it more exactly, I had no respect for him. I don't like characters who are supposed to be "the funny one". However, I'm in the middle of a long fic, and it's really changing my opinion of him. It takes place right after the series ends, and the characters are totally the same, but somehow he's working for me better than in the TV series. I can't explain that, but it's a pretty darned cool thing. (Also cool is how well some of these writers keep the 'cartoon' vibe. Somehow you can see it as animated in your head, as opposed to fics in other fandoms where you just read it and 'see' it like you would a book.)
I think what I'm going to do is look for an Avatar RP (MU*, LJ, something). If I can find a good one, that'd kill two birds with one stone. (I'm just a little nervous, I've never done RP over LJ before, but that seems to be the new thing, where all the MU* players have vanished to). And this time, I won't forget to cancel WoW after my month! I paid for six or seven extra months last time because I thought if I didn't log on it wouldn't bill me, heh.
I just wish I could lose this restless feeling. Settle down. Be happy with my "hobby" type things. I really, really hate the feeling of wanting to stay at work because I'm dissatisfied with the stuff I do after it.
About three years ago, I gave WoW a try. I had burned out on FFXI, had nearly quit, so I decided to check it out. It's like a MMO vacation spot! Bright, colorful, amazingly easy! (And highly amusingly, they've made it even easier in the years I've been gone. Lowered fees for things! Give even more XP away! Lowered level requirements!) So hey, maybe since I'm not having fun on FFXI, WoW would now work for me?
Installed it, patched, logged on almost two hours ago. The answer to the above question: A big meh. See, I don't want to play WoW, I want FFXI to be fun again. :/ Everything in WoW is wacky and different. I couldn't even move at first, heh. And the idea of actually touching the mouse on purpose! And the (lack of? different?) camera control keeps making me motion sick. Last time I played I only stayed a month, I doubt this visit will be any longer. (Oh, but a cool thing? My character from three years ago was still there, right where I left him, with all his stuff and all that.)
But what I'd really like to do, even more than WoW or having FFXI be fun again, is RP. "So log onto FF MUX and RP!" I can, and I have, but... but it's so meaningless (my part in it, not the game as a whole). Right now my character could ICly vanish forever and no one would notice. In months, years, maybe one or two people might, but I have no connections to anything in the game. Any RP I get is just random RP with random people with both of us grasping for a subject so we can keep the scene going a little longer. I want connections, I'd say "relationships", but that might imply stuff I don't mean. I want someone to ICly know I exist. I want to be part of something. Le sigh!
And now: Avatar. I decided to dive in and start re-watching it. That's really helpful with learning/remembering who the characters are. "Ooooh, that's who that is!" "Oh, this is where he came from, right!" But more than re-watching the series, I'm really happy that I found fanfic. It keeps the series alive even though it's over. And it's funny how it changes your view of characters... While watching the series, I disliked Sokka. To put it more exactly, I had no respect for him. I don't like characters who are supposed to be "the funny one". However, I'm in the middle of a long fic, and it's really changing my opinion of him. It takes place right after the series ends, and the characters are totally the same, but somehow he's working for me better than in the TV series. I can't explain that, but it's a pretty darned cool thing. (Also cool is how well some of these writers keep the 'cartoon' vibe. Somehow you can see it as animated in your head, as opposed to fics in other fandoms where you just read it and 'see' it like you would a book.)
I think what I'm going to do is look for an Avatar RP (MU*, LJ, something). If I can find a good one, that'd kill two birds with one stone. (I'm just a little nervous, I've never done RP over LJ before, but that seems to be the new thing, where all the MU* players have vanished to). And this time, I won't forget to cancel WoW after my month! I paid for six or seven extra months last time because I thought if I didn't log on it wouldn't bill me, heh.
I just wish I could lose this restless feeling. Settle down. Be happy with my "hobby" type things. I really, really hate the feeling of wanting to stay at work because I'm dissatisfied with the stuff I do after it.
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Date: 2008-08-12 05:30 am (UTC)I understand what your saying with the FFXI thing. I usually try not to spend as much time as you do around and a good portion of my time consists of standing around in whitegate while I'm actually doing something else on my computer or 360. Sometimes it feels like they need to add something to the game that's just straight up fun to do and people can have fun doing it. Overall games seem to have gone over the edge elitest recently. I think I blame the Wii for it because the giant influx of "non-gamers" seems to have the main gamer crowd riled up and ready to explode on anyone who doesn't do this and that or didn't play X obscure game from Y obscure console when they were 7. Or maybe I'm just over reaching with my logic...probably that.
I also get where you are coming from in your RP note with FFXI. Not a "relationship" but more of a deep friendship with an IC person. Like, friends from childhood onwards and if one were to die the others actions and reasoning would just collapse kinda thing. I used to RP alot but I found it too weird and couldn't continue on with it. Maybe it was just because alot of people were busy trying to make a character that was "cool" or "bad ass" instead of just making a character based on the best character you know of, yourself. Maybe it's just the way I did RP (doubt it) but I always found it more enjoyable to think how I would act in the situation with my own skills and knowledge as opposed to thinking: "What would cloud/sephiroth do? What would superman do? What would X bad ass from Y comic/anime do?"
Honestly, the only thing that keeps me playing FFXI is the close group of friends I've created over the past couple years that is mostly the windshire crew. I've logged on before and thought that it would be cool if I did this, that, and the other thing (all soloable) and then noticed no one was around at all so I would just stand around and wait for someone to at least be there before I did anything. It's very weird to me, at least given how I am in RL. Of course I could just be acting out and blah blah blah blah. But whatever.
Now to end this reply before I go even more off the deep end! XD
no subject
Date: 2008-08-12 04:22 pm (UTC)Though I scarcely admit it, I did a good deal of RPGs of the truer, nonvideogame sort when I was younger. Noone LARPed, but we tended to keep audio recordings as the content was often amusing and sometimes was transcribed (for particularly longer campaigns) into novels. People who created characters based on their personal hero tended to make unbalanced characters when creation rules were stuck to (min-maxers). These people generally thought themselves badasses or invincible because they were PCs...and the DM/ST taught them otherwise. A guy who thinks himself a hero and runs blindly into a fire to save someone dies of smoke inhalation just as easily as the person trapped. The people who play the characters based too much on themselves often suffer the same weaknesses, and tended to take the game way too personally. They never stuck around long.
In the end, the challenge of creating a character was making one that had flaws and strengths, and if they were different from the player then generally the player enjoyed the game a great deal more. If you're smart, play a brute. If you're reserved and quiet, play an extrovert or vice versa. Atheists play zealots. Or just play milder versions of various extremes, keeping in mind that most good stories don't happen to extremists, but normal, balanced, flawed people in extreme circumstances. And in the end, that's all RPing is - a sort of collective story-telling where everyone is responsible for one point of view.
no subject
Date: 2008-08-12 08:27 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-08-12 09:03 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-08-12 09:31 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-08-13 08:41 pm (UTC)Honestly, the only thing that keeps me playing FFXI is the close group of friends I've created over the past couple years that is mostly the windshire crew.
I'm sort of wondering if that's part of my current FFXI issues. My LS, which I have been on for almost four years now, is... I won't say "dying", but maturing? Everyone goes off to their Sky/Sea/whatever LSs, so 90% of the time I'm the only person sitting on the LS. On Saturdays, I can be the only person on it for 8-10 hours straight! That's pretty darned sucky. Even when there are a few people on, it seems like no one chats anymore...
no subject
Date: 2008-08-13 09:21 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-08-13 09:51 pm (UTC)