Snips and Snails and Puppy Dog Tales

Dark Horse (Class 5 Series Book 1) by Michelle Diener

I usually avoid romance books like the plague, but this one was SciFi/Romance, so I thought it might be okay.

The initial plot set up was great: A women and a small handful of Earth animals were abducted by "bad" aliens. An AI helps her escape.

Unfortunately that part of the plot was handled in a couple pages. Then the woman met the "good" aliens.

Picture aliens that know nothing of Earth. No ties to it, no visits to it. Yet somehow they look human other than a foot taller, slightly pointed ears, and they all look more beautiful or handsome than a human could ever be. SIGH.

The main character kept commenting in her head on their ears. "Look at those ears! These people are so clearly alien!" It was just the darned author trying to convince us that they were in some way aliens at all.

The females of the alien species are basically flat chested. So the males should find that attractive -- it's all their species ever knew, it should be their image of beauty. But nope. As soon as they spotted big-boobed main character woman, we got lines like this quote:

"He tried not to look at her breasts. They were perfectly shaped and magnificent."

MAGNIFICENT BREASTS. Ugh.

The writing was just so lazy. Just because you want romance doesn't mean you need human-looking aliens. Imagine aliens that look like giant birds, jellyfish, a pile of rocks, or something even more alien. Imagine an author skillful enough to pull off a romance between a woman and a really alien alien. Sadly it wasn't Michelle Diener.

Partial book credits:
Point reached in DNF book: 30%
Previous abandoned book total: 282%
New total: 312% (three books)