thistlechaser: (Cat shrimp (hungry now?))
[personal profile] thistlechaser
I've never cooked a hamburger. It's probably been twenty or so years since I had anything other than a fast food burger. However, after making meat loaf with [livejournal.com profile] tersa, we had a good deal of meat left. I tossed it into the freezer to wait until I could buy buns so I could try making burgers.

Buns in hand, I was ready to cook!

...that statement sounds more wrong than it was.

How hard could cooking a burger be? Shape it into a patty, toss it... um... into a broiler pan? Frying pan? Save me, Google! Okay, frying pan it is! Most sites said medium-high heat, four minutes on one side, two to four on the other. Sounds simple!

How the heck are burgers supposed to stay together? I patted and shaped and pressed my meat (oh baby!), but I couldn't make nice round patties that would stay together. Oh well! Once the frying pan was hot, I tossed the misshapen things in.

The fire department arrived soon after.

Okay, not really, but it was a mad scramble to get the battery out of my smoke alarm.

All sites said to cook it until it was 160 in the center, but I'm starting to wonder how accurate my meat thermometer is. At the eight minute mark (four per side) they were only 100 degrees inside. I checked them every two minutes, but they never got over 130. By the sixteen minute mark (double the time needed for thicker burgers!) I just took them out.

My first thought, before tasting them, was that it was totally not worth it. My apartment was full of greasy smoke. Corner to corner, all rooms, all the laundry I had just washed and hung up to dry, covered in greasy smoke. (I swear, my floors feel slick!) Then I tried one.

Oh. My. God. So good! They were a little (or a lot) burned on the outside and not pink at all in the middle, so I'm guessing they were cooked. So good! I inhaled them. And, unlike fast food burgers, I didn't need to set them swimming in condiments -- just a small dab of mayo and a squeeze of ketchup.

My apartment is still an issue. I think I can only do this when I can have all the windows open (it's hot today, so I have the AC on and everything closed up), and I need to bring my big box fans in and set them up. I can't believe how much smoke these things made! And my poor pan is going to need a scrubbin'.

Still: Best burgers I've eaten in twenty or so years! :D

Date: 2009-06-17 01:08 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] liedra.livejournal.com
Home made burgers are the best!
As for cooking them, don't use a huge amount of oil in the pan. The meat naturally has a lot of fat in it and it will come out in the cooking process. This may decrease the amount of smoke you get (which is usually caused by the oil getting too hot and burning). Also, depending on the thickness of the patty, I usually just cook it til it's good and brown on each side, then stick a knife in the middle: if the juice runs clear it's cooked :) (also you can have a look inside a bit to see how it is).

I often chuck some things like chopped up pieces of bread (kinda like big breadcrumbs) to help keep the patty together, and don't forget the onion, spices (parsley, pepper, garlic) and sauces to go in! A tablespoon or so of Worcestershire sauce per pound of meat is awesome in burger patties!

Now you've made me hungry :(

Date: 2009-06-17 01:29 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thistle-chaser.livejournal.com
Oooh, I didn't think to put oil in the pan! I figured the burgers would have enough (they were 20% or so, so not very lean). I think your way would be better to judge when they're done!

I did think about adding stuff, but I figured for my first attempt I'd keep it simple. Luckily that worked out well! Mmmm.

Sorry, I didn't save any to share! D:

Date: 2009-06-17 01:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] liedra.livejournal.com
Yeah, usually good to put a drizzle of oil (just enough to coat the area you're cooking in) in just to keep it from sticking to the pan (also gives it something to cook in until the natural fat melts). That's probably what caused it to burn/smoke a bit, it'd be an uneven cooking surface with stuck bits until some fats came out!

The "stick a knife in, if the juice runs clear it's cooked" rule is one you can use with most meats! It's great.

And it's okay, I have a cold atm so it's probably best I don't come sneeze all over your cooking!

I'll teach you how to cook a super easy roast chicken if you'd like! Nothing like a roast you prepare very easily, then stick in the oven and forget for a while, then come pull it out and it's done! ;D (none of this basting and poking and trussing crap!)

Date: 2009-06-17 02:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thistle-chaser.livejournal.com
Ah, I'll remember the oil idea!

And thanks for the offer of chicken, but I still have issues with eating things that are 'animal shaped'. First meat I went back to eating was burger, because it looked nothing like meat or animals! Sometimes things like stakes/roasts still gross me out, and whole chickens always do! Thanks anyway!

I never cook burgers, oh no....

Date: 2009-06-17 11:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] calandra.livejournal.com
Use one of the higher temp oils, or the oil itself will smoke. I like a bit of butter, but peanut oil works very well. If you're using oil, try brushing it on the burger instead of pouring a bit into the pan.

When making the patties, try to shape them as slices of a cylinder, not ovoids. They will cook much more evenly.

With practice, you can test doneness by poking the top of the burger and judging from the consistency.

I like adding shredded cheese and horseradish to patties. (plus maybe a sprinkle of salt/pepper)

Re: I never cook burgers, oh no....

Date: 2009-06-18 11:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] calandra.livejournal.com
Anytime. I wish I had more time to cook. (I wish I had more time.)

'dria complains about me smoking up the house too.

Date: 2009-06-18 02:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] voidmagus.livejournal.com
But...But....turkey!? What about turkey? Food of the gods, the only reason I survive dealing with family during thanksgiving!

Date: 2009-06-18 09:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thistle-chaser.livejournal.com
Sliced turkey breast? Yay! (I often have that as a sandwich.)
Whole turkey? No thanks! (But luckily I'm just one person, so I don't need to make a whole one!)

Date: 2009-06-17 02:12 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ani-mama.livejournal.com
XD You and your culinary adventures!

We use a burger press and parchment paper to make round patties, but it took a few different tries to find a press that worked well. But lumpy burgers taste perfectly fine too!

I toss an egg into the mix to help the meat stick together, and season it with garlic salt. Good quality ground beef tend not to need too much seasoning.

Date: 2009-06-17 02:26 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thistle-chaser.livejournal.com
But lumpy burgers taste perfectly fine too!

Yes! They were oddly shaped and falling apart, but still tasted great!

And oh, an egg would have been a good idea! I even have one, which is rare! (I haven't figured out how to get my cat to lay them yet...)

Date: 2009-06-17 02:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] citizenbleys.livejournal.com
You're still doing better than me, as evinced by these entries:

(1) (http://citizenbleys.livejournal.com/259650.html)
(2) (http://citizenbleys.livejournal.com/259933.html)

My friends still make fun of me for that.

Date: 2009-06-17 12:32 pm (UTC)

Date: 2009-06-17 08:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thistle-chaser.livejournal.com
*falls over* Heeheehee! :D

Date: 2009-06-17 02:47 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] quasilemur.livejournal.com
Worcestershire sauce, dry onion soup mix, and italian dressing all make good additives for burgers. If the meat is fresh, there really shouldn't be too much of a problem with it falling apart, but if so, the italian dressing helps there, too.

Then again, we've ground our own meat for years, so we might be spoiled. :)

Date: 2009-06-17 08:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thistle-chaser.livejournal.com
Oh mmmm. Good ideas, thanks!

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