thistlechaser: (Super Ninjas! (Naruto))
I'm sorry to report that there will be no amusing review post of those two movies. They were both darned bad, and not even bad in the amusing way. A minute or two of movie plot reenactment with generally HORRIBLE costumes (CARDBOARD IRON MAN SUIT) and bad acting, then literally a half hour of god-awful porn sex.

I know it's somewhat of a gender difference, but wow. Is porn so unsexy. I actually felt embarrassed for the actors. The dialogue was just so bad. The positions were silly. And I swear, some positions were held so long the actors must have been getting bored. (Though I did have to admire how flexible some of the women were.)

Avengers was better than Iron Man (though still bad). I liked the Hawkeye/Natasha scene, only because I was seeing it through fanfic eyes.

After the first sex scene of Iron Man, I started fast forwarded through the rest of them. I finished the both movies total in less than 40 minutes that way (30 minutes first sex scene, 10 for all the "plot" in two movies plus the time it took me to virus scan both movies, start one after the other ended, and the fast forwarding). I deleted both without a second thought.
thistlechaser: (Cat shrimp (hungry now?))
Three things make a post!

1) Awkward Stock Photo, [livejournal.com profile] akwardstock, continues to amuse horrify. At least this image is free to use?



2) Swimming depresses me for a small reason: Usually I'd love a summer like this: Temperatures in the low 70 with a cool breeze. That's great for everything... except swimming in an outdoor pool.

It's still leaving me exhausted. I spend the couple hours between it ending and bedtime staring blankly at the TV. zzz I need to do a few more checks, but it seems to be doing really good things for my blood sugar though, so YAY.

3) While looking around online for something totally legal and innocent, I stumbled upon something interesting. Iron Man XXX and The Avengers XXX movies. Two porn parodies! I have the next couple days off, so I'm intending to watch them and post reviews. The Iron Man one stars Dale DaBone -- that name tickles me endlessly.

Here's the trailer for the Iron Man XXX one. Surprisingly it's work safe (except two spoken curses).


The Avengers XXX trailer is funnier and even more safe for work (no cursing that I noticed). I snickered at the Hawkeye abuse!

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